Exasperation.

I'm sure all of us have been in this part of life once or more than once.
this point when you just feeling like throwing both hands up and screaming
"I GIVE UP!"
or wrenching your arms towards the sky with a burst of long-abhorred and accumulated anger and screaming
"WHY IS IT SO UNFAIR"

I bet all of us have these times.

This was just a little of how i felt today.
today was a terrible day, right from head to tail.

Flunked. flunked. flunked.
I told myself before i went to bed yesterday that whatever it is today, i would take it calm.
But that didnt quite happen for some reason.
I was tearing and ripping apart inside.
Just folded at a corner, feeling very small, even having pity for myself.
mann. this sucks. i was thinking:
"there's only so much i can take."

i just kept comforting myself. felt so small.
and useless.

Why had i become so dumb now.
why.

i just can't let the fact go, that im so dumb.

----
First thing in the morning.
gawd, i screamed at council :/

and ended up breaking out in sobs.
Argh.

I didnt expect myself to react that way at all.

I just had too much on my mind, too many things to say.

urgh.
i need a break. we all do. a pity its not gonna come.

I feel like i fell into a hole. so deep that it seems impossible to climb back up again.
that it's cold and scary. encaved in that boundary.

i hate boundaries, and yet ive grown so used to it.

thats all for about now.